For writing effect, I would have liked to title this blog "G@ddamm$#it I am Pale!", but my daughters would be very disappointed in me if I used the Lord's name in vain. "Mom, that's a venial sin, ya know?" So I didn't, but you will get THE point when you read further on. :-)
This week, I went to visit one of my dearest friends in the hospital. I rushed to her side when I heard she was headed to the ER. I was dressed in my workout clothes, felt a bit greasy, and it was late. Well, sadly, 8:00 at night is late, at least to me!
I made it to the hospital in about 9 minutes flat, rushed in to see her and was relieved to see she was getting the care she needed. She was her witty, spunky, cute self.
One of her nurses came in and saw me sitting bedside.
She gasped when she saw me and said, "Wow, YOU should be the ONE in the hospital bed, are you okay? EWWWW, You are so pale!"
Uh, umm, uh, ok.
Not, Hello there, how are you? Nice to meet you.
My dear friend spoke up for me, "Oh she's just like that, she's translucent!" with a twinkle in her eye.
The nurse went on, "My gosh, wow, oh dear, are you sure you are ok?"
I am okay. Did I stutter? ;-)
Since I was a little girl, I was called Casper (you know for the Friendly Ghost! Ironically, that was one of my favorite cartoons as a kid)by kids on the playground. Every summer, I spent long days at the country club pool getting as much sun as possible on this Fair Skin to deter the snide remarks. Funny enough, I did get tan. But now, in my 30's I am paying for that with sun damage. In college, I laid in tanning beds to TRY to resemble the J. Lo Glow or the sun kissed glamour that was associated with that time.
Really? ME? Blonde hair, fair skinned, blue-eyed lanky girl trying to get the honey kissed skin of Jennifer Lopez?
After college, sunless tanning spray booths, became the trend. So, here I was again, trying to mask the glare of the paleness. I would strip down into my birthday suit, get into all kinds of weird angles and positions to achieve just the right tan while shivering from the cold bath of tan promoting chemicals, promising to turn me from a pasty white weed to a golden goddess! In the last couple of years, I did the research on the negative effects of sunless tanning booths and found the ingestion and application of chemicals on the skin to be just too harmful and quite frankly, not worth it.
So, I am embracing the pale. I am embracing me. And I am NOT taking any remarks about my level of paleness personally, that's for darn sure! I'm ME!
Is it ever okay to meet someone and exclaim, "Wow, you look fat, are you ok? You must be overweight by 50 pounds!?" or "Your makeup is awful, that eye shadow is way too dark!" or "EWWW, That outfit does not match!" Now, if its one of your pals or loving family members , sure, offer your constructive criticism in a loving, genuine way.
The truth is, we are all unique. We are all our individual selves expressing our likes and dislikes through dress, hairstyle, jewels, and most importantly our demeanors and the gifts we bring to the world.
God made me this way. I have grown tired of trying to fit into the media standards. I must admit, I have hope for the world that our standards are shifting. Kim Kardashian, Jennifer Lopez, Nicole Kidman, Emma Stone, Jessica Chastain (my pasty partners in crime) and other media/celebrity darlings are embracing their God-given bodies and skin tones. Lady Gaga recently spoke of accepting your body, skin, hair with flaws and all, lifting your head high and proud, and being You and only You with or without the extra 15 lbs or that crooked bicuspid.
This is all not to say, you will not catch me wearing any makeup or putting highlights in my hair. I feel I put my best face forward with a little blush, mascara, and a touch of lip gloss. Let's face it, I need makeup, you can almost see my facial bones through my skin. :) Remember? I'm translucent :)
I am happy to be my best Jensy, My most authentic Jensy and yes, even the pale Jensy.
And when you meet me I might say, "Hi, my name is Jensy. And yes, I am pale." with a sparkle in my eye and an upturned grin. "It's very nice to meet you."